This past couple of weeks have been extremely busy. Hmm. That's a pretty crappy first sentence. I hope like heck I did better than that with the first line of my COMPLETED novel! I will now take a moment to do my happy dance.

After getting my hand slapped by my editor friend, I went to work on cleaning up the nits (spelling, punctuation) and a few freyed ends (plotlines that weren't nicely tidied up) and am mostly happy with the results. However, I want to make certain the 1st three chapters are the best they can be, and have asked her to read them over for me. She will get back to me soon -- even though she just sold her house (twice -- the first deal fell through-- before the For Sale sign went up). Welcome to Edmonton, with a real estate market that is really starting to cook. The biggest problem with selling a house in a hot market is that you have to buy another one, though. If my husband and I sold our house now, it would be to get the boat we want, and sail the oceans for a few years. We'd come back when the market cools. And it will. This province is, after all, based almost entirely on oil production. (Whew. What a long and winding paragraph. Glad I'm not writing my novel)

Went to the birthday party of a friend from my critiquing group yesterday. We ended up at a cabin at Muriel Lake, a nice little spot, with her family and friends, to celebrate her 60th year on this earth. She held a big celebration when she turned 50 (I didn't know her then), and decided to throw a big bash every ten years. She certainly knows how to do that. The food was great, she found delightful organic beer, and the company was very entertaining. I'm glad I went. And the best part is, she's going to share the bottle of wine I gave her for her birthday with me! Yahoo!

She had some wonderful news to share, as well. A publisher actually called her to make sure she was going to send him a YA novel she had queried him about. She has time off from her regular job, and will hammer away at getting it finished so she can send it out. Maybe I should be taking a page from her book. I so want to follow the rules (which is have the darned thing finished before word one goes out the door), and the opportunities offered to me are thin. (Read nil. But read on to see why.)

It gave me a jolt when she introduced me to her friends and family as the best unpublished writer she's ever read. At first I was pleased (I mean, who doesn't like to hear that someone thinks they write well?!?) but as the afternoon and evening wore on, her words haunted me. Why haven't I been published yet? What the heck is holding me back, if my writing is so good?

All I could come up with is -- I am. Marketing myself has never been a strong point, and writing query letters throws me into an absolute tailspin. I remember when I was writing the query letter for my first novel, which I'd written most of for my first 3 Day Novel competition. After 3 days of me playing around with the letter, my husband finally yelled "It took you less time to write the bloody novel!" And he was almost right. It's that first impression thing, though. I allow it to paralyze me. And it doesn't help that I write about difficult, flawed characters in difficult situations. (Yeah, you're right. Those just excuses. Trust me, I have a million of them. Which is why I'm still an unpublished writer.)

So what I have to commit to is sending the work out, and having a turn around time of 1 day, when I get a rejection. Because I will. What I have to do is commit to trusting my work, and my ability, and quit with the excuses. What I have to do is grow a thicker skin.

Holy crap.